
This month a
series of events allowed me to become aware when I was in resistance and
therefore blocking the flow of universal love and joy. I participated in Emmanuel Dagher’s Core Attunements that
discussed Evolved Wealth where he discussed service and tithing, which brought
up some resistance and resistance was the purpose of the meditation. I had to
observe what was being triggered, which was partially caused by my
understanding of the biblical implications of ‘tithing’ and also my fear around
not being open to this offering of love. I wasn’t really clear what ‘tithing’
meant to me. However, Emmanuel clarified that our giving of time is also
tithing and that prior to us accepting financial compensation our time was and
still is an acceptable form of tithing. However I had resistance to this. I
knew how I freely offered my time but did I openly offer a percentage of my
time and/or money to service the world? Do I have an expectation of personal
gain when I write my blogs or offer my radio/YouTube interviews? Or do I do
this as well as other services to unconditionally ‘gift’ the world and make it
a better place?
The other
resistance that came up for me was around abandonment. This past 10 days my boy
Jasper got frightened over a raccoon that, to Jasper, threatened his territory.
Cats are extremely territorial! It took too long to get this raccoon out of the
house: 30 minutes of screaming and using a broom handle to scare the unscarable
(not a pretty sigh). This created a huge amount of anxiety – of which I had
never seen – in my beautiful, loving boy Jasper. He no longer felt safe in his
own home. And when he wasn’t coming home to sleep, it triggered my abandonment
issues. I kept focusing on the pain of Jasper not coming home and taking it
personally. I was in resistance again.
So these two
unnerving experiences – around tithing and abandonment – allowed me to be open
to a new book being released by Gabby
Bernstein “The
Universe Has Your Back!´ as well as Gabby’s video The Art of
Manifesting: 5 Secrets to Attracting What You Want Video Workshop.
Combined with Emmanuel’s meditations I was able to begin to see some important
pieces to how I fall into resistance and block what the universe is waiting to
offer. The 2nd experience was far more important to me as I was
observing a core belief: abandonment. Abandonment, as most of you know, is
something I have been working on all my life. What I had to realize was
regardless of what was happening to Jasper it did not have anything to do with
him abandoning me. However, my focus on how I was feeling and the emptiness
that it was reflecting or the pain of abandonment, it was that feeling that was
keeping me in resistance to being open to shifting my focus on what I wanted.
The problem
for most of us is that we have a goal and instead of keeping our vibration on
what we want – so that the Universal Flow of love, joy, peace or consciousness
can bring around this possibility – we instead focus on the lack, the opposite
of what we want or the absence of what we want. As soon as we even say what we
‘want’ we are often already thinking of it because of what we don’t want! We
want to lose weight, but we continually focus on the weight we want to lose,
measuring and weighing ourselves instead of having a clear picture of what we
want and not worrying about how it comes about. We want financial security but
we worry about our bills. We want health and well-being but we focus on the
pain or on what isn’t working. Do you see the flaw there? The Universal flow of
Love, Joy and Well-being exist at all times and we receive exactly what we are
asking for at any given time. However, what we are asking for is usually the
opposite of what we want.
If you are
experiencing anything you don’t want it won’t change unless you shift your
focus from that to allowing and receiving this flow of Love, Joy and
Well-being.
I knew Jasper
was teaching me a very important lesson and I couldn’t easily allow him to make
his own choices if I was stuck in thinking this was about me being abandoned.
He couldn’t heal his safety issues if I was stuck in my own. He needed space to
heal but I could only focus on the pain I was experiencing. Just like the fear
of believing I wasn’t making a difference by unconditionally serving and
tithing.
When our
fears get triggered we fall back into patterns that keep everything stuck. I
knew these were my issues and that if I couldn’t shift out of them I would
continue the patterns.
Unfortunately,
I completely believed that Jasper was fully on the road to recovery, only to
discover that he had far serious conditions. I dedicated
a blog to Jasper, which you can read here. I only hope that I have the
strength to remember the love he shared with me over these years as a true
blessing and not get triggered by my abandonment issues.
So, how do we
open ourselves to the resistance so we can shift back into the Infinite Flow of
Love, Joy and Well-being? We have to move out of linear time. We have to shift
into the Now moment where we aren’t focused on our past triggers or our worries
about the future. The Now moment will allow us to connect with our Divine
Spark, our True Essence of BEing. Our truth lies within us and we can choose –
when we are consciously in the Now moment – whether we want Fear or Love! It’s
only when we are in the ever present moment that we can even observe what we
are feeling instead of being lost in our minds, lost in either the past or the
future. Once we are aware we can then make a choice. We can step out of our
pain and fear and overcome our resistance as we step into our true essence with
the power to receive LOVE and to know JOY!
Usually when
I think of fall, especially at the beginning of Sept, I think about new
beginnings, learning and change. This year my thinking seems to be on Intimacy.
I mentioned last month I’m participating in Emmanuel Dagher’s
“Core Healing” and this past week the theme was on Divine Partners. The topic
of intimacy came up and I believe due to the fact that today Venus enters Libra
and Jupiter is transiting into Libra early this month (Sept 9th) the
focus for many of us will be on relationships this fall and for the next year
(romantic, friends and colleagues) as Jupiter will be in Libra till Oct 2017.
I love the
word “Intimacy” as it brings up a series of thoughts and ideas; it is about ‘seeing me’.
Do you remember the movie Avatar? The beautiful piece of that movie was their
deep understanding of ‘seeing someone’ as they are; their inner essence. When
it comes to creating intimacy with others, romantic and otherwise, we need to
start with ourselves.
Intimacy is
the ability to truly be seen, which many of us crave. To be acknowledged,
accepted, heard, seen, appreciated etc. are all words that we use to describe
what we seek from a deep place within.
However, I
believe intimacy is also our deepest fear. We spend most of our time focused
outside of ourselves, worrying about what others think about us. We spend a
great deal of time trying to make others see us, but ultimately we worry about
what they see. We focus on their perceptions, their beliefs, what they may or
may not be saying about us and we get upset when we think we aren’t being seen
and when others think unkindly of us. The irony of this is that it is none of
our business. Truly the only thing that matters is not what others think of us
but what we feel deep within us and whether we remember our inner essence of
our Soul. We will never know what others think or feel nor will we know what
they are being triggered over when it ‘appears’ that they are upset with us.
And we can’t worry about that; because it is not within our control. The only
thing we are in charge of is how we feel within us. The thing with this is we
often are so focused outside that we don’t remember it is a choice how we feel
inside.
What does
this have to do with Intimacy (into-me-see) and our deepest fear of being seen?
You may be wondering. Here is what I’m thinking: the more we focus outside, the
more unconscious we are of our ‘discomforts’ or how we are feeling. We have
become unconscious of our fears.
These fears
of ‘intimacy’ come early in our lives – as soon as love becomes conditional.
Once love becomes conditional – we worry about whether we meet the conditions
of being loved and lovable. These fears also come from the collective
unconscious where women were persecuted for stepping into their power and BEing
seen. We have all had countless lives were being “seen” meant death, literally.
Ultimately, we don’t feel safe BEing seen. And if this is the case, even though
we desire on a deep level to BE seen by another, we fear it even more
unconsciously (or consciously in some cases).
This is why
‘intimacy’ must start within first. Remember my post “What
would you do… if you Loved Yourself?”? It was retraining you to consider
how you would act, respond, and BE in the world knowing you loved yourself. If
we desire others to ‘into-me-see’, then we must also see our true essence; the
wholeness within us that will never change.
Yet we do
many things to sabotage ourselves from BEing and remembering our true Self.
Addictions, health issues, weight issues and focusing outside ourselves are all
ways we sabotage our growth and hinder our remembering that we are already
whole and complete. We even hope that a relationship will complete us!
So, how do we
shift and BEgin to sincerely See Who we have always been from a place of Wholeness?
How do we shift our thoughts from outside to our Inner Essence of BEing?
Ultimately,
it becomes a choice. We often believe we have no choice; that things happen and
we are constantly dealing with the outcomes of life. However, within us lies a
strength that is infinite! Although everyone is different my belief is that
this power exists within the Heart where there is a Divine Spark that reflects
the ‘oneness’ of Source. It is perfect and Whole as is. We confuse this
wholeness by accessing our ‘human’ fears, relying on the mind for everything,
and focusing outside ourselves on past and future time lines.
But this
Divine BEing that is you is always present and you can access it in many ways.
It is the Observer of your life. It can only be accessed within the Now moment.
And it is Infinite!
Find your way
to access this Infinite Source of You and radiate it outward from the inside.
This will allow you to BE seen and to have Intimacy with others because you
will BE seen within first. If you are like most of us and desire to finally be
‘seen’ and develop Intimacy (into-me-see) with another in your life then take
the time to SEE yourself first. Truly get acquainted with the beauty that
exists within you. Face your fears, open your heart and remember you are
already Whole
See more at- https://www.intuitivesoul.com
This entry was posted in Blog and tagged #self-love, Clearing
and Healing Techniques, clearing energy, Divine Love, Emmanuel Dagher, Intimacy, Intuitive
Counseling, intuitive
counselor, Laurie
Huston, love vs
fear, Relationship
Advice, Relationships.
As most of
you know by now I look for my inspiration from my life. I dedicate my work to
Growing and Evolving towards Love within myself first! So, when I connect with
someone or a class I feel inspired to take, I will. This month Emmanuel Dagher
is promoting his Core
Attunements work that begins Sunday August 14th for 5 weeks. If you sign up
by August 10th you receive “A Clear Path to Healing” attunement that I have
received and that is the inspiration for this Blog! It is packed full of
incredible information on Healing and confirms much of my work. What I want to
discuss is the core belief that “Healing is Remembering You Are Whole”! How
inspiring is That! Think about the possibilities this suggests!
When we feel
separate from Source and our Inner Self we believe we have to heal, change or
fix ourselves or others. We believe this because we don’t feel our connection
to Source. We feel broken and ‘not enough’! We are driven to try to fix or
change ourselves and often do this by searching outside of ourselves. We seek
someone or something that will fix, change or heal our thoughts, our bodies,
our emotions and our Soul/Spirit. As discussed in my last blog on Addictions to
Wholeness we become addicted because we don’t remember who we are and that
we are already ‘whole’ within ourselves. We become addicted to searching
outside ourselves for the answer that lies within. That answer is that we are
already ‘Whole’! We don’t need to change or fix ourselves and healing occurs
when we remember this ‘truth’.
Now we know
that ‘things happen’ and we will never have complete control over anything that
‘happens’. However, we can be in charge of how we respond and we can choose
Love instead of reacting from a place of fear. We only react when we take
things personally. We take things personally because we forget ‘Who we are’ and
that we are already ‘Whole and Perfect’. True freedom comes when we stop
seeking outside ourselves and know what can only be offered from within. True
freedom comes when we stop our ‘addictions’ which distract ourselves from
discomfort and from feeling all the beliefs we have that we are Broken and Not
Enough. This is when we can stand in ourselves and, like Matt Kahn says,
“Whatever Arises, Love That”. Love it and remember that we are already Whole.
We have a Divine Spark within us that is Infinite and Whole!
Things happen
and we can choose to come from a place of Love instead of Fear. We can choose
to connect to that Infinite BEing within us that is Whole and Knows it is
Perfect just as it is. When we stand in a place of BEing empowered we remember.
When we get caught up in the Fear – and fear permeates the collective
unconscious of this planet so there’s a lot of fear – we then believe we have
to change, fix and heal something within ourselves or someone or situation
outside ourselves. This is how we forget and this is when ‘healing’ loses the
Magick that we inherently are.
Let me give
an example of what I’m saying: this month I had to have a root canal on a back
molar. Ten years ago I was told I would likely have to have a root canal on
this tooth. This month I remembered why I am terrified of dentists (after my
dentist asked me to meditate while she was doing a cleaning as she refused to
fill the tooth that needed a root canal): when I was 6 or 7 I ran into a wall
and chipped my tooth. The dentist that we had told my parents and everyone
(including our insurance) that I had to have a root canal on this tooth because
it was exposing a nerve. I discovered many years later this root canal was
never done and he lied. However, I believe now he was a bit of a sadist and
this lie gave him an opportunity to torture me without the proper local
anesthetic for a couple of hours. My mom remembers me screaming the whole time.
So this fear began a long mistrust in authority figures! This kind of mistrust
impacts almost every area of my life. It sets up a pattern of mistrust and a
belief that others can have power over me. So I kept putting off the procedure.
However
avoidance and ignorance won’t make something go away. We already tried this
with our addictions. Pretending they aren’t there won’t help us to BE Whole or
to remember our Infinite Self. Now it is possible that I could have
‘healed’ this from ever having to occur but as I said “things happen” and I had
delayed it out of fear for too long. Things happen because we need to remember
and in this case ‘heal’ my fear around a distrust of authority figures (which I
may have never realized if it wasn’t through this dental surgery). The gift in
‘healing’ may not be what we want (not having to ever go to a dentist) but can
certainly be what we need – which is to heal a belief that is disempowering!
Things will
continue to happen in our lives and our choice is to Remember Who we Are. To
choose Love over fear. To Remember we are always Whole. Our bodies are
temporary and borrowed. We can grow in changing our beliefs. I couldn’t trust
dentists so I ignored and avoided them. I chose Fear! Freedom comes from
choosing LOVE regardless of what happens and remembering the Magick of our
Infinite Self. This empowers us to Remember our Wholeness and experience the
Infiniteness of our True Self. Is there anything you are still living in fear
of? How can you Remember the Magick of YOU that is Infinite and Whole?
See more at- https://www.intuitivesoul.com
This month I
became aware of a deeper message on addictions: a deeper core message that
results in us rarely ever getting over them but usually just substituting one
addiction for another. There is a reason for this that is outlined in Guy
Finley’s book
Breaking Dependencies which was recommended by Emmanuel Dagher.
Our
addictions are what we create to fill a void. Of course the void is all
illusion but while we are asleep – metaphorically – we don’t feel whole. Our
addictions can be because we are a culture that doesn’t like to look at or feel
discomfort of any kind so we use sugar, alcohol, drugs and any other activities
to distract us from feeling uncomfortable. The discomfort stems from this
emptiness we feel inside us. This void is pure illusion because we are ‘whole’
in our ‘spirit’! When it comes to why we feel we aren’t ‘whole’ it is because
in our world love is conditional. This isn’t to blame anyone; it is just how
this physical world works currently. We are here to evolve towards love, to
make choices around love or fear. And when we feel we aren’t enough, that love
is conditional, we believe that this is true. We don’t feel that our option is
to choose love but to see fear in everything around us. And when that moment
becomes our story, we choose an addiction to fill the emptiness that tells us
we aren’t enough or we aren’t lovable as we are!
Addictions
come in multiple forms: from what we ingest to help us feel pleasure, to
creating co-dependent and dependent relationships. As infants we were
completely dependent on our family and as we learned that love is conditional
we developed strategies to help people love us. We create coping mechanisms
that are ‘addictive’ ways to live in our world. What addiction we create is
because we feel this emptiness inside us and our ego becomes formed and within
our nature we tend to have the voice that tells us this piece of chocolate will
fill the void (even if just temporarily) and the other voice that pushes
against it that says we need to be strong and avoid the temptation because it
is unhealthy. Unfortunately both voices are keeping our addictions occurring because
even the voice that tells us to be strong is suggesting that we need to change
or fix something within us. We choose addictions and dependencies to fill an
emptiness that can’t be filled because the emptiness doesn’t exist: we are
‘whole’ and there is no piece of our spirit that isn’t complete. Sugar,
alcohol, cigarettes, feeling that we need everyone to like us or judging
others, is just filling a temporary emptiness that keeps us in a pattern that
makes us believe we need to have outside things, outside approval, feeling
superior over someone or pleasure to heal, fix, change something inside of us
that will make us more complete! This need comes from our ego and unconscious
nature – not our ‘true Self”.
Nothing we do
outside or inside will make us complete until we ‘remember’ who we are! Who we
are, has nothing to do with this physical world and its ability to make us
whole. It comes from observing ourselves. We can only free ourselves when we
hear, feel, see or know when something changes where we feel a craving to fill
the emptiness or discomfort within us. Let’s look at an example in my life: I
have been using both food (sugar and salty foods) and binge watching on Netflix
or Streaming movies and series because I’m feeling an emptiness within me. When
I look deeper it can come from suggestion while watching some movie or show or
it is why I busy myself watching and get caught up which creates the
unconscious pattern of either binge eating or watching Netflix. Looking even
deeper I can acknowledge many of the behaviors I see as disempowering me coming
from a similar unconscious ‘need’ to fill my time, because of loneliness,
dis-ease, or a void within. I laugh at the absurdity of my nature thinking that
food will even temporarily fill the void or that I can even convince myself
that just one more time and I will never want it again because I will have
filled that ‘need’. But then I can see the darker parts of me that constantly
measure my worth against others. If I judge someone it is because I measured
myself as superior in some way. I have done both: measured myself as superior
and then seen someone as inferior and yet I still desire them to like and
approve of me. And our desire to have everyone like us comes from the same
emptiness. No matter how many people approve of us as long as there is one
person who doesn’t our ego justifies its position to feel empty and not worthy.
And there is
no outer or inner thing we can ‘do’ that will make our addictions go away. If
we diet we are actually strengthening our resolve that there is indeed
something wrong that we have to fix. And it will strengthen the ‘need’ to fill
it with more food eventually – or just replace it with something else. We all
know those people who become addicted to exercise after a diet; people who have
to eat more after quitting smoking; or people who make a health choice to
become vegetarian but judge everyone who isn’t. They just replaced one
addiction with another!
We will only
overcome our addictions – and there are many different kinds within each of us
– when we can remember that we are not our bodies; that we choose a Loving
Nature over fear; that our ‘infinite spirit’ resides within each of us; that we
can let our ‘hearts’ lead our ‘heads’ and know that we are ‘whole’ and complete
as we are! When we know we have certain tendencies that we want to change, we
should observe that part of us that chooses to fill a void.
Feel the
void! Give it a voice and then Remember you are Perfect and Whole
just as you are! Remember that Light within you and Shine it out
to the World!
See more at- https://www.intuitivesoul.com/
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