Addictions to Wholeness!

This month I became aware of a deeper message on addictions: a deeper core message that results in us rarely ever getting over them but usually just substituting one addiction for another. There is a reason for this that is outlined in Guy Finley’s book Breaking Dependencies which was recommended by Emmanuel Dagher.

Our addictions are what we create to fill a void. Of course the void is all illusion but while we are asleep – metaphorically – we don’t feel whole. Our addictions can be because we are a culture that doesn’t like to look at or feel discomfort of any kind so we use sugar, alcohol, drugs and any other activities to distract us from feeling uncomfortable. The discomfort stems from this emptiness we feel inside us. This void is pure illusion because we are ‘whole’ in our ‘spirit’! When it comes to why we feel we aren’t ‘whole’ it is because in our world love is conditional. This isn’t to blame anyone; it is just how this physical world works currently. We are here to evolve towards love, to make choices around love or fear. And when we feel we aren’t enough, that love is conditional, we believe that this is true. We don’t feel that our option is to choose love but to see fear in everything around us. And when that moment becomes our story, we choose an addiction to fill the emptiness that tells us we aren’t enough or we aren’t lovable as we are!

Addictions come in multiple forms: from what we ingest to help us feel pleasure, to creating co-dependent and dependent relationships. As infants we were completely dependent on our family and as we learned that love is conditional we developed strategies to help people love us. We create coping mechanisms that are ‘addictive’ ways to live in our world. What addiction we create is because we feel this emptiness inside us and our ego becomes formed and within our nature we tend to have the voice that tells us this piece of chocolate will fill the void (even if just temporarily) and the other voice that pushes against it that says we need to be strong and avoid the temptation because it is unhealthy. Unfortunately both voices are keeping our addictions occurring because even the voice that tells us to be strong is suggesting that we need to change or fix something within us. We choose addictions and dependencies to fill an emptiness that can’t be filled because the emptiness doesn’t exist: we are ‘whole’ and there is no piece of our spirit that isn’t complete. Sugar, alcohol, cigarettes, feeling that we need everyone to like us or judging others, is just filling a temporary emptiness that keeps us in a pattern that makes us believe we need to have outside things, outside approval, feeling superior over someone or pleasure to heal, fix, change something inside of us that will make us more complete! This need comes from our ego and unconscious nature – not our ‘true Self”.

Nothing we do outside or inside will make us complete until we ‘remember’ who we are! Who we are, has nothing to do with this physical world and its ability to make us whole. It comes from observing ourselves. We can only free ourselves when we hear, feel, see or know when something changes where we feel a craving to fill the emptiness or discomfort within us. Let’s look at an example in my life: I have been using both food (sugar and salty foods) and binge watching on Netflix or Streaming movies and series because I’m feeling an emptiness within me. When I look deeper it can come from suggestion while watching some movie or show or it is why I busy myself watching and get caught up which creates the unconscious pattern of either binge eating or watching Netflix. Looking even deeper I can acknowledge many of the behaviors I see as disempowering me coming from a similar unconscious ‘need’ to fill my time, because of loneliness, dis-ease, or a void within. I laugh at the absurdity of my nature thinking that food will even temporarily fill the void or that I can even convince myself that just one more time and I will never want it again because I will have filled that ‘need’. But then I can see the darker parts of me that constantly measure my worth against others. If I judge someone it is because I measured myself as superior in some way. I have done both: measured myself as superior and then seen someone as inferior and yet I still desire them to like and approve of me. And our desire to have everyone like us comes from the same emptiness. No matter how many people approve of us as long as there is one person who doesn’t our ego justifies its position to feel empty and not worthy.

And there is no outer or inner thing we can ‘do’ that will make our addictions go away. If we diet we are actually strengthening our resolve that there is indeed something wrong that we have to fix. And it will strengthen the ‘need’ to fill it with more food eventually – or just replace it with something else. We all know those people who become addicted to exercise after a diet; people who have to eat more after quitting smoking; or people who make a health choice to become vegetarian but judge everyone who isn’t. They just replaced one addiction with another!

We will only overcome our addictions – and there are many different kinds within each of us – when we can remember that we are not our bodies; that we choose a Loving Nature over fear; that our ‘infinite spirit’ resides within each of us; that we can let our ‘hearts’ lead our ‘heads’ and know that we are ‘whole’ and complete as we are! When we know we have certain tendencies that we want to change, we should observe that part of us that chooses to fill a void.

Feel the void! Give it a voice and then Remember you are Perfect and Whole just as you are! Remember that Light within you and Shine it out to the World!

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This entry was posted in Blog and tagged addictions, Clearing and Healing Techniques, clearing energy, Intuitive Counseling, intuitive counselor, Laurie Huston, News for the Heart, News for the Heart Radio, Wholeness.

What would you do… if you Loved yourself?

Recently, I came into contact with an amazing healer Ziad Hashash https://www.facebook.com/ziadhach and have purchased his Divine Partner series that has been an incredible journey into LOVE! He asked this powerful question in his Self-Love session: If you loved yourself what would you do? To ask yourself this for 21 days every time you have to make a decision small or big it is a way to honor your choices and your Divine Child.

As I pondered this question I saw how many times I sabotaged myself. I began making better choices and could see that there are reasons for everything. Last week, Ziad discussed needs and manipulation in the Divine Love section of the series. This was the last piece I needed to help me see – or to have wisdom – as to why certain things were still sabotaging my desire for divine health from the inside out.

Let’s discuss what this means. We have needs and wants that were never met as children and these needs turn into patterns by the age of 7. These needs have blocked us from moving forward towards love. And they never matured into our adult understanding of who we are now. These are usually basic needs such as needing to be loved, needing to be heard, seen, supported, acknowledged, and safe and these needs have affected our self-worth.

Fast forward to whoever you have now become, a ‘you’ who has pushed these needs down into your subconscious and they now come out as manipulations. Not intentionally, but acting out as our wounded inner child who still needs these needs met, we often sabotage ourselves by asking for the needs we had as children to be fulfilled. For example: someone who has been abandoned and didn’t feel safe as a child would still manipulate life around her to have others show her she is now supported or safe. Can you see how this would work? Since we don’t realize this is a need from our 1-7 year old self we manipulate our world around us and we manipulate others so that we can have others show us what we need. The problem with this is that it is manipulating others and we don’t actually get what we need because what we need needs to come from within as we address the real needs of the inner wounded child! However knowing about the how and why of your manipulative actions can give great insights into why things continue to thwart your deeper needs: the healing of the inner child.

I need to make an aside about manipulation here: we aren’t talking about manipulating maliciously; we are talking about how as a small child we needed to have certain needs met, needs related to learning something that we likely contracted to learn in this life. Something that is related to a core belief so that we continue to search for our needs to be met outside of us because we ultimately feel separate from God. Our parents did the best they could and were likely contracted to support our learning by doing something like in my case putting me up for adoption to help me learn about feeling safe and supported. So I searched outside of myself to feel safe and supported while my adoptive parents, friends, and loves could never meet that need no matter how they tried because it wasn’t the outside that was the problem. So, when I would manipulate myself, my body and others it wasn’t malicious. It was to finally understand my need within.

My need within for Divine Health.

Once I asked myself – and healed some of the reasons I was making poor eating choices for example – ‘if I loved myself, what would I do’, I had other areas come up such as pain that was blocking me from being able to move freely! But I wasn’t asking why I had pain? So, where I thought I had healed one area I just brought another up for observation and I became more aware of it because of the pain. My need for feeling safe and supported was now being highlighted.

I realized this ‘pain’ was just another result of where I was sabotaging my health to manipulate myself and others to feel safe and supported within. That was the true problem! All of the past few years of ‘pain’ have been helping me, or trying to help me, see the truth behind my not feeling safe and supported. Because the outside world can’t make me feel safe or supported it is my wounded inner child that is manipulating everything outside to show me my inner beliefs and needs!

No matter how much I change my outside world to reflect how safe and supported I truly am I will continue to manipulate myself and others around me until I can feel safe and supported inside! Yet I would have never seen any of this without the help of this so important question: If you loved yourself, what would you do? And I would never have seen this without the continuous questioning of why certain things are ‘happening’ in my world.

Everything is in our life for a reason! Every person, ache, allergy, dis-ease… everything! Yet if we continue to see everything as personal and continue to engage our ego we will miss the lesson.

If we continue to blame and judge another for what is happening in our lives we miss the lesson! If we judge or shame ourselves we miss the lesson. The lesson isn’t outside of us, it is the light that is inside that has been bruised by a belief that we could have chosen before we were even born!

How empowering is the question “if you loved yourself what would you do?” I invite you to continue to dig even deeper into all the pieces of your magnificent puzzle that is YOU! You might uncover why you do the things you do, and shift into just BEing your true essence! You might finally understand your “wounded child” and honor your Divine Child within. You could uncover why you manipulate yourself – and others – and make choices that are healthier and then, shining even greater, the Light that is YOU!

This entry was posted in Blog and tagged #manipulation, #sabotage, #self-love, choices, Clearing and Healing Techniques, clearing energy, Divine Health, Divine Love, Intuitive Counseling, intuitive counselor, Laurie Huston, Ziad Hashash. Bookmark the permalink.

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I choose to tune into the reality where…

I have always been against the way the Law of Attraction (LOA) has been described in ‘The Secret’ and by many other people and their books that have arisen as a result of this documentary. Mostly I have had issues about it because it tends to focus on everything outside of us and, really, does having the biggest house ever assist us in our spiritual growth? I believe that many of us are too focused on our lives from the outside – making ourselves comfortable and accumulating ‘things’. However, when it comes to the things that count, we often hope that there will be something outside ourselves that will assist us. We long for enough money so that we can experience the ‘freedom’ or ‘happiness’ we so desperately seek inside. So we tend to accumulate ‘things’ that will make us more comfortable but do they assist us inside?

Recently I have been introduced to a beautiful Soul Sister, Michelle Gordon, who has written two series of ‘fiction’ books that once you begin to assimilate you realize they have a sense of ‘truth’ within them that just can’t be explained as fiction or fantasy. While reading her ‘Visionary Series’ she introduces the concept of choosing to tune into a reality from the infinite possibilities that exist once we make a choice. Now this isn’t a ‘new’ concept to me but it was introduced in a way that deeply resonated with me. As Tom Campbell often discusses in his work we have infinite possibilities and probabilities based on our choices that exist simultaneously. And of course Jerry and Esther Hicks have discussed the concept of the radio and tuning into the frequency we desire.

What set this apart was the simplicity of how Michelle offered her concept. What if it is as simple as stating to the Universe that “I choose to tune into the reality where…”. During a recent meditation with my Heart-Centered Support Group I asked everyone to have their guide show them three different possibilities of realities to choose from. For each possible reality I asked each person to go into the future one year and then five years to see if that first year outcome needed to be tweaked as they may have forgotten to request something that was essential – or of course during that time they may have made different choices that created outcomes that may or may not have been what they were intending.

I believe we all have dreams that we want fulfilled in our lives. As my disdain for the LOA continues it isn’t about the biggest house or the fastest car: it is about assisting us to be the ‘best’ we can be from the inside. Having optimal health, having inner happiness or peace, living with intention and purpose and having the ability to practice acceptance in my life as well as with others, these are a few of the inner ‘things’ that are important to me. These can not be realized by focusing on what is outside of me. No amount of accumulation of ‘things’ will ever achieve these desires. However being homeless or stuck somewhere that doesn’t feed my soul would definitely impair my growth. In Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs if we are stuck in Survival or Safety needs we won’t be able to evolve to Self-Actualization and will be forced to work on these lower level issues first and foremost.

I guess the question I want you to ponder is, “what do you truly need to be all that you desire to BE?” Our Heart and Soul do dream and inspire us to Evolve and BEcome. If we forget to Dream we will never grow. If we don’t look at our challenges as opportunities to grow we will never Evolve. And if we don’t look at our choices, always asking if we are making our choices from a place of Love over Fear, we can’t learn to make better choices. So if you knew that you could choose to tune into a reality that already existed where you made the choices that allowed you to achieve your dreams would you? Could you believe that there is a possible reality out there that exists with all the choices where what you dreamed of are present and occurring?

What if these simple words, here in this article, were the key to shifting into the alternate reality that already exists as a possibility? Can you imagine this? We know that stating your dreams to the Universe lets your ‘support-team’ know that you are ready (and if you aren’t then you will receive the gentle guidance necessary to shift your beliefs) to experience the reality you choose. But so often we either forget to ask or else we doubt our dreams! Why would we doubt an inspiration that comes from our Heart or Soul? So why not totally commit to the dream and reality that exists? Why not ask to tune into the reality where you ARE living with intention and purpose and optimal health  – having already learned the lessons you needed around living without optimal health or living on purpose already!

So, believing that this is the case and that we can tune into this reality you don’t want to fool around but to be clear, ask, and allow the Magic to Unfold! What will you Choose? I choose to tune into the reality where…

choices, Clearing and Healing Techniques, clearing energy, fear vs love, Intuitive Counseling, intuitive counselor, Laurie Huston, Law Of Attraction, LOA, Michelle Gordon, News for the Heart, News for the Heart Radio, reality, Tom Campbell. Bookmark the permalink.

See more at: https://www.intuitivesoul.com