2020 – Year of Ascension & Spiritual Growth

For many years now people have been saying that 2020 will be essential to our next stage of Spiritual Growth and Ascension and calling it the Age of Aquarius – which feels like it has been happening since the mid 80’s. What are your expectations for this new decade? I know astrologically we are going to experience some challenging events like in 2018 with both Mars (Sept to Nov) and Venus (May and June) going retrograde. However, beyond these astrological events it seems the greater events of interest is because of the transits at the end of the year and that is why there are wide expectations of this being an important Year for Spiritual Growth and Ascension. Saturn enters Aquarius Dec 17^th (briefly entering earlier in May and June before retrograding back into Capricorn); Jupiter enters Aquarius Dec 19^th and there is a Great Conjunction – where Saturn conjuncts Jupiter in Aquarius Dec 21^st – which occurs every 20 years but the last time when it was in Aquarius was 1405 and will be again in 2080. The event has suggested celestial significance and belief that the Star of Bethlehem was actually a Great Conjunction.

So what constitutes a proclamation of a year becoming the Year of Ascension? Could astrological events determine the energies? I honestly can’t seem to feel what this new decade’s energies will suggest. I have felt years that have had significance and the energies felt clear to me. This year I’m unclear. Maybe it is because over the past few years I have come to a different understanding of what our purposes are here: that it isn’t about some miraculous event occurring that will change our energy but rather it is our choices and our fears that assist us to become more conscious and more able to Evolve in our Spiritual Growth. If we want to change, to evolve, we have to Become the Change. Nothing outside of us will create this change. We can be supported by outside influences but ultimately we have to want to change and make the efforts to create the change within us.
What creates Ascension?

• Intentions
• Consciousness
• Less fear
• Now moment living vs living in the past or future
• Choices

It is difficult to determine what comes first. I think we need to begin with our Intentions. We have to start somewhere. We usually ponder all the things we don’t want first. This is a call to the Universe that we put too much importance on what we don’t want, our fears. So I believe we must become clear about what we do want. When we set an intention we proclaim what we are dreaming about and what we intend to do for this year and beyond and not only what we intend to do but also how we want to BE. So let’s remember to take a few moments and set our intentions to Grow Up and move toward our Ascension (whatever that may be). Last month I pondered how to make a Wish and this may assist us on what to set as an Intention and how.

Consciousness seems like the important next step. We must become conscious of our lives and how we are responding to our life happenings in each moment. Consciousness is a state of BEing. We are either conscious or we are living our lives on autopilot. When we are on autopilot we miss being aware of our lives passing us by. We aren’t engaged and we can’t find the sacred in each moment. We are stuck in a rut and our fears are keeping us distracted and in our ‘story’. When we are conscious we can use our senses to respond to our life. We will be aware of our choices and we can clearly reflect on our choices and reactions when something is triggering us. We can Breathe. We can Know how to respond in each situation as it happens – instead of feeling out of control and feeling like a victim. When we are conscious we can be in charge of how we respond – it allows us to Evolve and Grow Up.

Once we set an Intention and become more conscious our Fears will become more evident. We will discover just how much our fears play in our story. On autopilot our fears control us. As we become more conscious – as we have set our Intentions – we can see how ridiculous our fears are and that our fears are not based in reality. They don’t have truth. They are fears that we have picked up prior to the age of 7 and they have defined us for the rest of our lives. The Core Fears are: Fear of being alone, Fear of Failure, Fear of losing something (death), and Fear of the Unknown. With our consciousness we counter the fears by knowing we are Enough and also connected to all of Life so we are never alone and never rejected; we are Awesome and able to do whatever we intend so we never really fail; We are on an Amazing Journey of Consciousness so we never really die; And we are ultimately Consciousness and Connected so nothing is unknown. As the movie ‘Frozen’ keeps telling us: “Let it GO”. Our fears aren’t real – they can be faced and accepted. We can let them go!

Being present and in the Now Moment is when we can truly be in charge of how we respond to life. Typically on autopilot we are stuck in the past or worried about the future. We are in linear time – being controlled by our fears. We are stuck in our story that has defined us – the patterns of our life. However once we Breathe, set Intentions, and are more conscious then we can change our experiences through our awareness. We can identify our fears, our patterns that hold us back or out of the moment, our story and as a result: make a choice to change. It is only in the Now Moment that change can happen. It is in the moment that we are conscious, that we aren’t in autopilot, that we become aware of the fears that govern us. And in such moments we can decide how we want to BE. We can examine our Intentions, our fears, the story we have told over and over about who we are. In this moment we can define our next moment. We can change how we respond to the past and create our future. We can be aware of the fears and make different choices.

Which brings us to the last point about our choices. When we are in autopilot we are stuck in the story, our fears, distracting ourselves from our pain and usually feeling like a victim. We don’t see that we have a choice when we feel like a victim! Ironically we aren’t in control of anything outside us in the world – we can only be in charge of how we respond to what is happening around us. This means that we can choose whether we want to be stuck in the core fears – Fear of being alone, Fear of Failure, Fear of losing something (death), and Fear of the Unknown or we can choose to see beyond these fears. We can decide how to react – we don’t have to take anything personally because how others respond is through their own fears. It doesn’t excuse them but it does help us understand how our own fears are dictating how we make choices. My easiest example is of an ending of a relationship/marriage: it isn’t personal, it isn’t about either person versus the other person, it is about their inner choices and their fears – it isn’t personal as in person-to-person. I choose to Grow Up and I make choices from a place of Love and Acceptance and as a result my choices are aligned with where I see my life going and I make every attempt to not take other people’s choices as personal.
This year, 2020, this new decade, I choose to set my Intention to continue to Grow Up, to become more conscious of how I’m living my life, to face some of my deepest fears and acknowledge them, to live in the moment as much as I can and to make Choices that continue to assist me on this Incredible Journey into myself as an integral part of All That Is. I Intend and choose to be conscious of and to use the Support of the Universe, fearlessly, in my unfolding moments in and through 2020 (and Beyond) in my Awesome Journey of Ascension and Spiritual Growth. And as always I Invite you to share your Journey with me; assisting me to Grow Up. Happy New Years!

This entry was posted in Blog and tagged 2020, Ascension, choices, consciousness, Growing Up, Intention, Laurie Huston, Less Fear, New Years, News for the Heart, News for the Heart Radio, Now Moment. Bookmark the permalink.

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What would you do… if you Loved yourself?

Recently, I came into contact with an amazing healer Ziad Hashash https://www.facebook.com/ziadhach and have purchased his Divine Partner series that has been an incredible journey into LOVE! He asked this powerful question in his Self-Love session: If you loved yourself what would you do? To ask yourself this for 21 days every time you have to make a decision small or big it is a way to honor your choices and your Divine Child.

As I pondered this question I saw how many times I sabotaged myself. I began making better choices and could see that there are reasons for everything. Last week, Ziad discussed needs and manipulation in the Divine Love section of the series. This was the last piece I needed to help me see – or to have wisdom – as to why certain things were still sabotaging my desire for divine health from the inside out.

Let’s discuss what this means. We have needs and wants that were never met as children and these needs turn into patterns by the age of 7. These needs have blocked us from moving forward towards love. And they never matured into our adult understanding of who we are now. These are usually basic needs such as needing to be loved, needing to be heard, seen, supported, acknowledged, and safe and these needs have affected our self-worth.

Fast forward to whoever you have now become, a ‘you’ who has pushed these needs down into your subconscious and they now come out as manipulations. Not intentionally, but acting out as our wounded inner child who still needs these needs met, we often sabotage ourselves by asking for the needs we had as children to be fulfilled. For example: someone who has been abandoned and didn’t feel safe as a child would still manipulate life around her to have others show her she is now supported or safe. Can you see how this would work? Since we don’t realize this is a need from our 1-7 year old self we manipulate our world around us and we manipulate others so that we can have others show us what we need. The problem with this is that it is manipulating others and we don’t actually get what we need because what we need needs to come from within as we address the real needs of the inner wounded child! However knowing about the how and why of your manipulative actions can give great insights into why things continue to thwart your deeper needs: the healing of the inner child.

I need to make an aside about manipulation here: we aren’t talking about manipulating maliciously; we are talking about how as a small child we needed to have certain needs met, needs related to learning something that we likely contracted to learn in this life. Something that is related to a core belief so that we continue to search for our needs to be met outside of us because we ultimately feel separate from God. Our parents did the best they could and were likely contracted to support our learning by doing something like in my case putting me up for adoption to help me learn about feeling safe and supported. So I searched outside of myself to feel safe and supported while my adoptive parents, friends, and loves could never meet that need no matter how they tried because it wasn’t the outside that was the problem. So, when I would manipulate myself, my body and others it wasn’t malicious. It was to finally understand my need within.

My need within for Divine Health.

Once I asked myself – and healed some of the reasons I was making poor eating choices for example – ‘if I loved myself, what would I do’, I had other areas come up such as pain that was blocking me from being able to move freely! But I wasn’t asking why I had pain? So, where I thought I had healed one area I just brought another up for observation and I became more aware of it because of the pain. My need for feeling safe and supported was now being highlighted.

I realized this ‘pain’ was just another result of where I was sabotaging my health to manipulate myself and others to feel safe and supported within. That was the true problem! All of the past few years of ‘pain’ have been helping me, or trying to help me, see the truth behind my not feeling safe and supported. Because the outside world can’t make me feel safe or supported it is my wounded inner child that is manipulating everything outside to show me my inner beliefs and needs!

No matter how much I change my outside world to reflect how safe and supported I truly am I will continue to manipulate myself and others around me until I can feel safe and supported inside! Yet I would have never seen any of this without the help of this so important question: If you loved yourself, what would you do? And I would never have seen this without the continuous questioning of why certain things are ‘happening’ in my world.

Everything is in our life for a reason! Every person, ache, allergy, dis-ease… everything! Yet if we continue to see everything as personal and continue to engage our ego we will miss the lesson.

If we continue to blame and judge another for what is happening in our lives we miss the lesson! If we judge or shame ourselves we miss the lesson. The lesson isn’t outside of us, it is the light that is inside that has been bruised by a belief that we could have chosen before we were even born!

How empowering is the question “if you loved yourself what would you do?” I invite you to continue to dig even deeper into all the pieces of your magnificent puzzle that is YOU! You might uncover why you do the things you do, and shift into just BEing your true essence! You might finally understand your “wounded child” and honor your Divine Child within. You could uncover why you manipulate yourself – and others – and make choices that are healthier and then, shining even greater, the Light that is YOU!

This entry was posted in Blog and tagged #manipulation, #sabotage, #self-love, choices, Clearing and Healing Techniques, clearing energy, Divine Health, Divine Love, Intuitive Counseling, intuitive counselor, Laurie Huston, Ziad Hashash. Bookmark the permalink.

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What Choices do you make at your Trigger Point?

This month I want to write about something that has been occurring in my life on a regular basis. People are getting stuck in their lives and falling back on their ‘known’ story and so often such stories are full of drama because of the origin of those stories. This problem is occurring with people who are becoming conscious and honestly sincere in their evolution towards love. I believe that there is a mirror here for me and I’m exploring this as it isn’t just one client and I’m feeling stuck with my clients who are stuck! Oh MY!

I have been involved with several shows on ‘The Story of ME’ and it was the subject of my last blog.  And I have had several more shows since then with Christopher Papadopoulos, Thomas Campbell, and Jean Adrienne where we have also discussed this topic. So, we understand that this ‘story’ is not a representation of our truth, but really our story is from our perspectives that are due to our experiences that come from our egoic thinking mind. It typically has some level of insecurity, lack of self-confidence, inability to forgive or our trying to justify our actions or emotions. But we get stuck in the process and fall back into our ‘stories’!

What I want to explore is the moment we have that will allow us to make an easier shift towards getting out of our heads and into our bodies, heart and gut, where we can make present moment decisions that will not expedite our journey into full drama. That moment where we are first triggered. That moment when we are anxious or first feeling insecure, whatever the initial trigger is. That is the moment when we can head off the full blown drama attack.

So what is our ‘thinking mind’ really doing in that ‘trigger moment’? We’re trying to control and manipulate things so that they are the way we want them to be or believe we want them to be. But really the only thing we have any sort of control over, or have some sense of being in charge of, is our emotions (which our thinking mind doesn’t believe because it doesn’t deal with emotions but only thoughts and the memories of emotions).

So in the trigger moments I always say there is a choice! When that first moment of our trigger happens we can still make a rational choice. But after that we are in full blown attack and our rational mind is nowhere to be seen! Sometimes we just have to ride the wave and hope to come through the drama attack without too much damage.

So what is the choice you ask? It is to acknowledge we are feeling anxious. And to acknowledge that this anxiety creates a deeper fear within us that isn’t based on truth but rather a perceived misunderstanding that has been accepted as truth due to our past experiences. It means we can choose not to do the thing that makes it worse … you know grabbing food to fill the void or doing the thing that has the impact to push you to breaking point. It is the moment we can make a choice before the choice is appearing to be taken away from us. (The choice isn’t really taken away, it just feels like that.) It is that moment when we still have a choice to acknowledge that we are feeling uncomfortable before going over the edge. And if we can bring awareness into that feeling of discomfort we are conscious enough to bring ourselves into the now moment. Christopher Papadopoulos offered an amazing meditation in our last interview on this exact topic, it will allow us to move into our bodies to release the anxious energy. A must listen.

What I have learned from this whole experience was pretty impressive.  One of my longest term clients (and dear friend) who probably has triggered me the most due to the fact that our ‘stories’ are the same [we were both abandoned at a young age] inspired me to look deeper into this. I realized that what our ‘thinking mind’ is really doing is trying to put the blame or projecting the problem onto someone or something else; the closest thing for me is my health; for her it was an ex. These represent what we need to heal or accept within ourselves.

You see, we project our deepest core issues onto others when our core issue is much deeper and goes to a time when we weren’t conscious enough or emotionally mature enough to understand what was happening. I’ve been abandoning myself by making the wrong choices in my diet (filling the void with poor choices) and not being able to build my energy again. My client/friend had been making her issues about someone else when in fact the problem is never someone or something else… it is always our own issue.

So in a way our ego is just helping us heal or accept a deeper truth but our thinking mind goes to lay blame elsewhere! I think this is a normal response. It is just that if we can see the bigger picture then we can understand that our patterns and ‘stories’ were created before the age of 7 – before we were emotionally mature enough to comprehend what was happening, and unable to see that it wasn’t personal. As a spiritual Being we are able to understand mentally most concepts and feel into our emotions but as a child we had no reference point: we could only establish our own misunderstandings. And since we felt dependent on our parents we concluded, from a conceptual basis, this must be love.

To heal these wounds we have had to make different choices… and when we don’t realize that we continue with the same ‘stories’ as created by our young selves. We are unaware that what is happening isn’t just a re-enactment of the same core fear: these incidents continue to play out to assist us to create a different story.

At any point in the process we can create another story, choose to respond differently, see that it isn’t the other person or thing that is the problem but rather a belief we made before the age of 7 that is showing up to help us grow. Can you make the decision then – next time something ‘happens’ to you – to see the ‘bigger picture’ and choose to respond by becoming conscious and present?

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