I believe I have
understood a huge piece of the puzzle this past couple weeks. I’ve understood
how when it comes to relationships, it is never about the other person (which
at the time was a huge learning for me). This past month when something
occurred that triggered my feelings of victimhood I was able to step out of the
pain and fear and observe my reactions (after a few hours of pity, anger and
fear). I was able to understand that something wasn’t being done “to me”. I had
a choice how I could respond. Instead of being outraged and fearful, I came
into a place of acceptance that although I didn’t know how, I would be
okay and this would be my choice.
As I faced this
situation where I felt the need to do something to change, fix and heal my
situation, I instead came from a place of Being. I chose to come from a state
of my core essence, not my reactionary state of fear about my future or a past
pattern from my childhood. I chose to accept the situation and myself for who I
was. I also chose to see how I use situations that “happen” in my life to play
out an old scenario of pain and victimhood. I chose to grow from a place of
love, instead of allowing my ego to react from fear.
I completely
understood that you have to be in the Now moment, or present to acknowledge
that you even have a choice. That if you are in your past patterns of sabotage
and fear or worrying about the future, you only can react from your perceptions
of fear. We all go through our own unique issues, based on our experiences. I
saw, just like in relationships, where we think or believe that this is ALL
about the other person, that there are always two people (like every situation
has two or more sides). What we believe is about the other person, never is. It
is our illusion of fear based on our experiences, conscious or unconscious,
real or imagined that influences us to perceive the events as we do. We may
also perceive events in our lives through our parent’s judgements, hidden
triggers from our past lives or our genetic lineage. Ultimately, we experience
what our Soul wants us to experience which is in divine order. It is so much
more complex than we imagined. And it’s not about blame or accepting blame;
it’s about responsibility. But again not what you expect or imagine. Seeing our
true responsibility is freeing, not restricting. It means we have power, and
the ability to choose.
What I learned is
that we truly can be in charge of how we respond. However, the important piece
was that I had to be fully present. When I was in rage and fear, I was mostly
reacting from my past patterns and worrying about my future. To be fully “in
charge” I had to step into my power, see my reactions for what they were and
accept that I had a choice. An empowered choice to not be bullied or taken
advantage of, to do what I felt was right (my perception of what I felt was
right for me, which may or may not have been from ego) and choose to respond
from a place of empowerment. It was completely freeing and I could see how many
of my choices felt like they weren’t choices but reaction from being a victim.
It opened up infinite possibilities for me to see and allowed me to feel
empowered as I made the choice instead of feeling guilt, shame or powerless.
It can be very
difficult to SEE ourselves. We often get stuck in a pattern that IS our life,
until we DECIDE, enough! When we make the decision that we want more or that we
want something different, that is when we look through the window to get a glimpse
of who we truly are. The more we open up and become curious about discovering
the truth of us, that is when we begin to see that we have the power to choose
something different – we have the power to create the most miraculous life.
May this empower
you to see another side to your story.
See more at:
http://www.intuitivesoul.com/empowered-choices
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