This month I
want to write about something that has been occurring in my life on a regular
basis. People are getting stuck in their lives and falling back on their
‘known’ story and so often such stories
are full of drama because of the origin of those stories. This problem is
occurring with people who are becoming conscious and honestly sincere in their
evolution towards love. I believe that there is a mirror here for me and I’m
exploring this as it isn’t just one client and I’m feeling stuck with my
clients who are stuck! Oh MY!
I have been
involved with several shows on ‘The Story of ME’ and it was the subject of my
last blog. And I have had several more shows since then with Christopher
Papadopoulos, Thomas Campbell, and Jean Adrienne where we have also discussed
this topic. So, we understand that this ‘story’ is not a representation of our
truth, but really our story is from our perspectives that are due to our
experiences that come from our egoic thinking mind. It typically has some level
of insecurity, lack of self-confidence, inability to forgive or our trying to
justify our actions or emotions. But we get stuck in the process and fall back
into our ‘stories’!
What I want
to explore is the moment we have that will allow us to make an easier shift
towards getting out of our heads and into our bodies, heart and gut, where we
can make present moment decisions that will not expedite our journey into full
drama. That moment where we are first triggered. That moment when we are
anxious or first feeling insecure, whatever the initial trigger is. That is the
moment when we can head off the full blown drama attack.
So what is
our ‘thinking mind’ really doing in that ‘trigger moment’? We’re trying to control
and manipulate things so that they are the way we want them to be or believe we
want them to be. But really the only thing we have any sort of control over, or
have some sense of being in charge of, is our emotions (which our thinking mind
doesn’t believe because it doesn’t deal with emotions but only thoughts and the
memories of emotions).
So in the
trigger moments I always say there is a choice! When that first moment of our
trigger happens we can still make a rational choice. But after that we are in
full blown attack and our rational mind is nowhere to be seen! Sometimes we
just have to ride the wave and hope to come through the drama attack without
too much damage.
So what is
the choice you ask? It is to acknowledge we are feeling anxious. And to acknowledge
that this anxiety creates a deeper fear within us that isn’t based on truth but
rather a perceived misunderstanding that has been accepted as truth due to our
past experiences. It means we can choose not to do the thing that makes it
worse … you know grabbing food to fill the void or doing the thing that has the
impact to push you to breaking point. It is the moment we can make a choice
before the choice is appearing to be taken away from us. (The choice isn’t
really taken away, it just feels like that.) It is that moment when we still
have a choice to acknowledge that we are feeling uncomfortable before going
over the edge. And if we can bring awareness into that feeling of discomfort we
are conscious enough to bring ourselves into the now moment. Christopher
Papadopoulos offered an amazing meditation in our last interview on this exact
topic, it will allow us to move into our bodies to release the anxious energy.
A must listen.
What I have
learned from this whole experience was pretty impressive. One of my
longest term clients (and dear friend) who probably has triggered me the most
due to the fact that our ‘stories’ are the same [we were both abandoned at a
young age] inspired me to look deeper into this. I realized that what our
‘thinking mind’ is really doing is trying to put the blame or projecting the
problem onto someone or something else; the closest thing for me is my health;
for her it was an ex. These represent what we need to heal or accept within
ourselves.
You see, we
project our deepest core issues onto others when our core issue is much deeper
and goes to a time when we weren’t conscious enough or emotionally mature
enough to understand what was happening. I’ve been abandoning myself by making
the wrong choices in my diet (filling the void with poor choices) and not being
able to build my energy again. My client/friend had been making her issues
about someone else when in fact the problem is never someone or something else…
it is always our own issue.
So in a way
our ego is just helping us heal or accept a deeper truth but our thinking mind
goes to lay blame elsewhere! I think this is a normal response. It is just that
if we can see the bigger picture then we can understand that our patterns and
‘stories’ were created before the age of 7 – before we were emotionally mature
enough to comprehend what was happening, and unable to see that it wasn’t
personal. As a spiritual Being we are able to understand mentally most concepts
and feel into our emotions but as a child we had no reference point: we could
only establish our own misunderstandings. And since we felt dependent on our
parents we concluded, from a conceptual basis, this must be love.
To heal these
wounds we have had to make different choices… and when we don’t realize that we
continue with the same ‘stories’ as created by our young selves. We are unaware
that what is happening isn’t just a re-enactment of the same core fear: these
incidents continue to play out to assist us to create a different story.
At any point
in the process we can create another story, choose to respond differently, see
that it isn’t the other person or thing that is the problem but rather a belief
we made before the age of 7 that is showing up to help us grow. Can you make
the decision then – next time something ‘happens’ to you – to see the ‘bigger
picture’ and choose to respond by becoming conscious and present?
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See more at: http://www.intuitivesoul.com
