Since
then and especially this past two years I have learned a lot about my fears
associated with me. One area has always been my weight and I didn’t fully appreciate
the connection weight has to food, exercise or even hormones until recently.
And when it comes to weight gain – I have noticed that we have a great deal of
shame associated with our bodies. We see the way media portrays health and
although models seem unhealthy to me the media seems to have made such models
the dreams of every young girl – and recently boys – and these dreams seem to
be connected to our thoughts about our body image and how in many cases we try
to or fail to achieve the ‘ideal body image’. And why is this? There is a lot
at play here but ‘addiction’ is one such challenge.
When it comes to addictions – food – is the one area
we can’t just stop. We have to eat. Smoking, drug abuse, excessive streaming
are areas that we can stop cold turkey (albeit not easily). But food, stopping
eating – not so easy. Recognition of addictions are key to understanding how we
sooth ourselves when feeling uncomfortable. Emotional eating is something many
struggle with – and this is the kind of eating we do when we feel
uncomfortable. And we could be uncomfortable about many things in our lives.
And with comfort eating may come comfort weight gain but that is not actually
very comfortable at all because the shame associated with weight or our body
image is unbelievable!
We are the only one to blame when it comes to our
weight. We can play the victim and say it is genes – or blame the processed
food industry etc. – but ultimately we know that we are at fault. And so what
do we do? We shame ourselves for appearing the way we do.
When it comes to food we have little control over our
ego’s needs and desires. In fact we probably don’t even realize how insidious
our ego is when we feel sad, depressed or out of control – and then we reach
for food (or whatever is our vice) to comfort us. It becomes an automatic
response to our emotions. Our ego spends an inordinate amount of time focusing
on what we shouldn’t be eating. Eventually it wears us down and we reach for
something that will soothe our emotional state.
Once we reach for something to soothe us we begin the
cycle of shame and guilt. We give in and often feel we have “no willpower” to
make better choices. This leads to a downward spiral often leaving us depressed
and unhappy. We offer statements to life that “next time or next week I’ll do
better”. We don’t realize that our ego is sabotaging us at every turn – it’s
that insufferable voice that creates fear by shaming and triggering our
reactions. Trying not to give in becomes an obsession as that is all our mind can
think about. For periods of time we can do better and we feel we are in
control. But our ego is often in control of our lives; using fear to control
and sabotage our best efforts. And it is our fears via ego that ultimately take
control or our reactions. However, it is the shame out of most of the emotions
that overwhelms us and makes us fall back into our old patterns of reactions.
With the overabundance of information on diets and
food it is no wonder we are confused – what is best for us – low fat, low
sugar, celery juice, keto, Atkins and the list goes on and on. However science
seems to be clarifying our understanding as we now know, for example, that
sugar is really a drug and GMO products are interfering with the balance of our
internal body systems. Then we take into consideration the multiple food
intolerances that are changing how our bodies interact with food and there is
also our gut health which has become so crucial to how we tolerate and process
food. Yet when we feel uncomfortable – stressed, depressed, saddened – we reach
for something comforting. And then focuses on something to distract us from
whatever it is that is making us feel uncomfortable. And that is why
‘comfort food’ eating happens: it’s a distraction. Question: Is it our ego determines
our eating patterns?
However, it is the shame that seemingly defines us. It
is the shame that makes us want to hide instead of participate in life. Shame
stops us from acknowledging how our ego is sabotaging us. Shame is a powerful
emotion that forces us to continue to hurt ourselves. How do you come to a
place of acceptance when you feel so ashamed of who you are? How do you forgive
yourself for something that you feel so ashamed about?
Shame is an emotion that we find challenging to deal
with. We may have learned to not take it personally when someone is ashamed of
us – like families or friends. However, we find it almost impossible to make
choices – healthy choices – when we are ashamed of ourselves. The thing is we
can’t allow shame to shame us. We are exactly where we are supposed to be. If
we are learning about body image and healthy foods for our digestive system –
it is an ongoing process.
I think it is time we realize that the world we live
in is so much more than we acknowledge. This world is Magical and Beautiful. We
are the center of our world and we can choose how to respond. So don’t allow
your ego to trick and sabotage your intention for a healthy life. Become
educated about YOU. If you can’t make changes to your diet immediately – or fail
to follow a program perfectly – acknowledge that it is part of the journey and
don’t let any temporary sense of failure derail you. Find a way to
unconsciously Love and Accept who you are right NOW. Don’t worry about the past
or the future. Change happens in the moment. Connect to your Inner Goddess/God
and Breathe. You can choose how you want to respond to your ego and your
cravings. You can choose to BE without shame because where you are right now is
the only way to embrace YOU.
This entry was posted in Blog and tagged addictions, Body Confidence, Fear and Ego, Laurie Huston, Love and Acceptance, Shame, Shame on... Me?, Weight Loss. Bookmark the permalink.
Content Source- https://www.intuitivesoul.com/shame-on-me#more-8906
